Meditation Diary

Day 13 | 02/06/2020

[ Sirshree_SelfAwakening (Apna Dhyan SwaDhyan) ]

You are not your SELF. That's why the question is being asked Who Are You? When it is in self inquiry, Who I AM? You are not your thoughts, you are not your body. That's why, when thoughts come or have some 'disturbing' bodily experiences, just have your SELF will always remain constant, steady and stable. While meditating, you might have lot of distraction and you may frustrate because, could not concentrate. But, accept it for time being. all thoughts, sounds, etching, numbness etc. things are not constant. They are just about to vanish. Although you can't control them all, doesn't mean they are to disturb you. they are to make you aware that you are distracted from your SELF and go back to it. It reminds you, you are not on STABLE mode. So, can say, these disturbances are blessings in disguise.

this session is to aware you about all this. it starts with inquiry and shifts your understanding from disturbances to blessings. It also touches to your experiences in and out of the session. Personally, I recommend it for all. I will surely repeat it. 

Disclaimer: If you have done with Maha Aasmani Retreat, this session could be the good revision. If you had not being through the Maha Aasmani, still you may try but if you are confused with meaning of some words or could not understand the essence, keep that aside from your thoughts and continue.

Link for this meditation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=01_aMEvoVRY

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] Self meditation - Awakening of the real you | अपना ध्यान, स्व - ध्यान (by Sirshree) "


#miPratik


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Day 12 | 01/06/2020

[ Sirshree_Awakening (Jagruti Dhyan) ] 

Many people say that, initially they start meditation for the meditation itself. But they experience that unknowingly they fall asleep. When I was to meditate in group earlier, I experienced these kind of people with me, they actually started snoring. Yes. If you face this, this meditation is for you. 

It starts with very simple line 'meditation is not to sleep'. Further, it explains in detail about 'not to sleep'. This is not only about body sleep but also of mind sleep, thoughts sleep. In some essences, this is some sort of spiritual meditation which shifts your view to spirituality. It makes you more aware in the situations.

Intentionally, I have played this session at night when we have to sleep for our body, it gave me another meaning of falling asleep.  towards the ending, it has been said,  'your eyes should always be opened' and surely, it is not talking about mere physical eyeballs with uncovered eyelids. one can understand the core meaning of this when went through the entire session. And then slowly session ends with saying 'open your eyes to help  others open their eyes.' again, in spiritual essence.

If you are good to understand the spiritual meanings, this session is good for you. 

Link for this meditation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTDYjctvt2g

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] Awakening meditation - The art of awakening with eyes closed (जागृति ध्यान) by Sirshree "


#miPratik


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Day 11 | 31/05/2020

[ Sirshree_JourneyOfMeditation (Dhyan Yatra) ]

At the start of any meditation, most of time, we are unclear about the term 'meditation' itself. What is this? What is it exactly about? Why to do it? What I will get out of it? These might be several questions before stat. It happens with some people, due to lack of this knowledge, either they won't start or if started, could not continue anymore. 

This session at its initial stage, tries to give some clarity on these questions. I said tries because, many people are still unclear because of 'words' used. You might still have questions. I suggest, do not get stuck into those. If you are of mindset that, 'first let me get 'satisfactory' answers to these questions and then only I will proceed to meditation in my life', let me tell you, after this much of little bit of understanding though, start practicing the meditation. The answers to your questions lies in your experience. Once you started, you will automatically get answers.

This session is about 36+ minutes. After some discourse on meditation, it continue into the meditation. Enough time for your self inquiry on Who I AM? If you want to revise or get motivated for why to do meditation and do it in actual time, this session is perfect one. I recommend it for all. Even for myself, I will repeat it.

Disclaimer: If you have done with Maha Aasmani Retreat, this session will at first, revise those session from meditation point of view and then will give you the conviction over the retreat about I AM. It will complete your agenda to get back to the SELF. If you had not being through the Maha Aasmani, still you may try but if you are confused with meaning of some words or could not understand the essence, keep that aside from your thoughts and continue.

Link for this meditation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Q_Z-VD6_0g&t=5s

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [Hindi] Journey of meditation - Knowing what to do in meditation | ध्यान यात्रा (by Sirshree) "

#miPratik

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Day 10 | 30/05/2020

[ Sirshree_Remembrance (Simran Dhyan) ]

Inquiry based meditations asks you questions. These questions are about your beingness, SELF and helps you to centre yourself at your actual SELF. They help you to get back and stable on your SELF. This is one of that kind of meditation.

Link for this meditation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELg8vZlHqB8&t=4s

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] Remembrance meditation - Recall what the world made you forget | सिमरन ध्यान (by Sirshree) "

Personally, I could not concentrate today to that efficiency. The question 'Kya mei bhool gaya hu ki, ....?' (Did I forget ....?) evoked some sort of negative sense in me. I felt, it would be better to phrase this question 'Kya muze yaad he ki, ....?' (Do I remember ....?). Even the better substitute would be 'Yaad karen ki, ....' (Remeber, ....). Feeling this negativeness, I tried to skip the further questions in this inquiry session. Therefore, initially, had 'wandering of mind'. So, to bring it back to the session, I made this 'wandering' quite fruitful for myself about coming future. Did some planning - in short, I used this time of meditation to work on 'power of subconscious mind' book. I made images of what I desire in coming future and all that. In between, for short period of time, I keep coming back to focus on narration, but again get back to my own thoughts.

Conclusion, earlier, I used to waste this time (when I could not concentrate) in unnecessary thoughts and unfruitful wandering of mind. Today, I used this time more efficiently and productively. Although had not been at that level of required level expected in this session, I was on my own level. Focused into it very much deeply, had no attention towards body. Well, whenever I had broke the chain of my thoughts to listen the narration, that time I experienced body sensation and felt some sort of numbness in butts and heel. Again going back to my thoughts, I ut that numbness aside and continued with my own thinking. So, I think, I had very small movement apart from initial etching at the start of  session. 

For my self personally, I won't attend this session again. I don't say it is useless or I don't even oppose it. But it is not for me - I felt. You may try for yourself once and then decide. I am not giving any negative critique here, just putting my experience and thoughts over this. Reader is requested to see this from neutral point of view and not to judge the narration (or me) based on reading about this particular session.

Worth mentioning thing today, this was morning session. Being Saturday, not required to think about office or any other thoughts or plans for the day. Still, compare to last night so much relaxed session, this was not that much fruitful. Is it because of this particular meditation only? or anything else.

Further, yesterday evening, had no coffee. Therefore, the effect of caffeine was not there. But every morning and evening, I do have coffee before meditation. Does it affect the thought process? Does coffee stimulate the thinking - either of 'wandering mind' or of channeling thoughts themselves into meditation? Does the intake of coffee make any significant impact on any session? Well, this need to be studied. 

#miPratik

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Day 09 | 29/05/2020

[ Williams_Sound&Thoughts ]

Sirshree and his meditation is close to my heart. Still, as part of exercise, tonight did this session, different than routine. This session is about focusing on your sounds and thoughts. 

First, note all the sounds coming from all direction. And then also note, the gap between the two sounds. I felt it like to capture difference between the frequencies. (Bit technical :p ).

Second, after noting the sound, note your thoughts. What thoughts are coming in your mind, simple look at those and let them pass, then let the next thought come in and let it be passed as well and keep it continue. When you are told to see thoughts, you don't label it as 'wondering of mind' rather, they become part of your meditation. Those are to give you meditation exercise and they are really useful at such times :) .

Third, towards the end, it asks you to focus on your breath and practice it as this is the only thing available with you always, any time of the day at any place.

Well, now, I have been practicing for some large time sessions of about 25+ minutes (and willing to go for 40+ minutes, this 8+ minutes session, personally I felt too short of time. Also, the narration I felt so mechanical like I was just to follow what is being said. Not felt like meditation but like just sitting silently for a while. 

After practicing meditation where we deep dive into it, this is not satisfactory to that level. Still, recommended if you have short of time. Else, to have feel of longer time, one can reduce the speed of narration (settings required). 

Now, I feel, my body has adopted for longer sessions and so, the 'disturbances' are being quite late to arise in those sessions. For this, I didn't even realized when it has been started and all of sudden, it ended too. In between, body has zero movement. Not a single etching or any numbness. Well, is it because of short time period? Is it because my mind is more relaxed than morning as after morning session, I have series of tasks whereas, in the night now, had nothing to do as such and just to write this blog and sleep? Is this thing keeping me in the session in the 'silent' state? Need to find this.

#miPratik

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Day 08 | 28/05/2020

[ Sirshree_Truth (Satya Dhyan) ]

After so many years, had this experience. First time today from day one of this diary, did not want to come out of meditation. Wished to have this to be continued for the long and long and long time. The ultimate experience. Hoping to have this since so long, Searching for this particular meditation. It brought me closer to self experience of SELF. No need to make inquiry of "Who I AM?" Just deep dive into this session and automatically you will get the answers on your own through your own experiences. It connects you back to the SELF. It makes realise the SELF. It puts you at the core. A MUST DO session for all by which your conviction about I AM gets stronger and stronger. 

Personally, I will do this again and again - for the expereince of SELF , of I AM and increasing the conviction about I AM.

Very slight distraction at the start only. Once went deep in to the session, not had any attention towards bodily experiences. Not a single movement of any part of body. It is quite contradictory to put this sentence but there is limitation to express the experience into the words as it is, even at the end, had to make forceful movement whereas, all body, mind, thoughts and all senses wanted to continue the experience of SELF. 

Disclaimer: If you have done with Maha Aasmani Retreat, this session will give you the conviction over the retreat about I AM. It will complete your agenda to get back to the SELF. If you had not being through the Maha Aasmani, still you may try but if you are confused with meaning of some words or could not understand the essence, keep that aside from your thoughts and continue.

Link for this meditation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qvrhCKpFsc

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] Truth meditation - Knowing "I am not the body or mind" | सत्य ध्यान |(by Sirshree) "

#miPratik

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Day 07 | 27/05/2020

Session 1:

[ Sirshree_Music (Swar Sangit Dhyan) ]

Disclaimer: If you have done with Maha Aasmani Retreat, this session is best for you. It gets you back to the core of Maha Aasmani. If not, still you may try but if you are confused with meaning of some words or could not understand the essence, keep that aside from your thoughts and continue.

This meditation is about self inquiry that is shifting from asking "Who am I? "to "I AM". With every question being asked, it is very much engaging till the end. As you go deep into answering the question one by one, you will deep dive into the meditation and the ultimate experience of SELF. Finally, it endsup with making you stabilize into the experience of SELF once you get the answer of "Who am I ?" as "I AM". To write it here in the words, about the meditation is very much different than the actual experience one could get being into the meditation. Better, one should try this meditation for own experience.

Being completely engaged, had no attention towards bodily experiences. Some wondering of thoughts had occured but was quite negligible. Around 20+ minutes of session ends very fast that you don't even get to know, you had been in the state for 20 minutes. Time passes so fast due to its engaging contents and so, I would like to attend it once again. Really wonderful session.

Link for this meditation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qvrhCKpFsc

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] The music of meditation - Vibrations of the key "Who am I"| स्वर-संगीत ध्यान (by Sirshree) "

#mipratik

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Day 06 | 26/05/2020

Session 1:

[ Sirshree_Direction (Disha Dhyan) ]

Usually, during meditation those thoughts arises which we would not even think of in routine activities. This happens because of the power of mind to wonder infinitely. From a jar of jam in fridge to even horse-shoe nebulae somewhere in the universe.

This meditation is to channelize your thoughts back to meditate. Wherever you are, in the market, in some other city, it brings you back to your self core. 

Since last few days, I was taking pillow to support at back. Today, decided to sit at the middle of the room, with no any support. It was fine at the start. In course of time, started pain at center and lower back. Neck got heavy and started paining at the joint of neck and shoulder. Heavy numbness observed in right toe and started spreading up to knees. At certain point, it was unbearable and being distraction. So, had some movement. But not sufficient to reduce it. Apart, some etching across the body and annoying flow of a droplet of sweat across back, face, ears and all that. Therefore, could not concentrate that much efficiently and effectively today.

Link for this meditation:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VI76KI5loJU

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] Direction meditation - Focusing inward to the truth | दिशा ध्यान |(by Sirshree) "

#miPratik

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Day 05 | 25/05/2020

Session 1:

[ Sirshree_SafeZone (SurakshitDhyan) ]

The name itself tells all about what would be in the session?

It answers mainly those aspects of people why meditation is not the routine practice?

One most observed thing in people is they are unaware about doing 'nothing'.

Next comes, people are reluctant to sit for longer duration in silence. And the main reason is, they are told to close the eyes? Here, for some people, it starts resistance to continue the practice. Closing eyes is like cutting the contact with outer world, disturbing the flow of 'information' coming in. That's why, people stay away from meditation itself. 

This thing mainly has been answered in this session. Giving clarity on this, it further extends to develop the habit of meditation. How can that be achieved and keep in continuation? 

Peace lies in safety. When you are safe, then only you can experience the peace. Therefore, to attain the peace from meditation, first it is necessary for your safety. But safety from what? What is the 'danger'? This is being answered in this session.

Personally, I felt safe than ever before. I realized what was the danger for me? What I had fear about? And attending this session gaves the safety needed before attaining peace.I would like to suggest, before you do the Peace Meditation, go for this Safe Zone meditation.

Bodily experience, I was not aware about because, fully focused on narration. Unknowingly for once or twice, had some movement may be because of etching or sweating (don't remember why?)

As usual, mind wondered at the start only. Later, was in flow of narration and stable, anchored.

Link for this meditation:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDTBl0_9YFw

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] Safe zone meditation - The unaffected center of your being | सुरक्षित ध्यान (by Sirshree) "



#miPratik


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Day 04 | 24/05/2020

Session 1:

[ Sirshree_IAm ]

Before starting about this session, answering two comments I received:

1. Why are you doing guided meditation? 
There is no difference as such between guided or self initiated. The only thing is, during self initiation, you are motivated though at the start, there is risk of getting distracted by thoughts. If you are expert enough, you may continue with your practice. At this point, guided meditation works like an anchor. Although you are in the stream of thoughts, it keeps you anchored to the meditation and reduces the chances of distraction. Agree, there is still risk of 'wondering minds' but is lesser one than self initiated cause, it brings your attention back to the meditation. And if you look in micro perspective, ultimately, self initiated is also guided one - by self. If you are trained, it would help you to sail. If you are not, I suggest, first at least take guidance for more effectiveness and efficiency in your further meditation. I think, learning never goes waste. Rather, it gives another perspective.

2. Meditation is boring. 
Well, not you, but most of people thinks the same. As I said in yesterday's article, it is difficult for people to do 'nothing'. This requires awareness. Why people feels it boring is because, they are not aware about what exactly to 'do' when they are told to 'do nothing'. In such cases, guided meditations help you to 'do nothing'. What I suggest, first thing first, prepare yourself for the meditation (if you really want to). Allot specific time for it and decide with yourself that, how much ever I feel it boring, I will continue to do it (to 'do nothing'). Off course, at the first time, it will be quite difficult. And may be, you would never come for seconnd chance. So, instead of lengthy sessions like 40 minutes, or 30 or even 20 minutes, start with small sessions of some 5 minutes. Practice few session for few days. Then increase your time to 10 minutes. And slowly go on adding. At the end, I would say, it's really not boring but, lack of practice makes you feel so. Once you deep dive into it, you will surely love it.

Now, back to about today's session:

As it's name " I AM " meditation, it brings into focus " I AM ". It brings you back to who you are? The agenda of this session is to make query to yourself about yourself. Alongside, it gives you answer too. The answer lies in your self experience during meditation. It makes you aware about body and so about the bodily experiences. The essence is knowing yourself through self experience.

Because so much inline narration, first time today, i went deep into the meditation. As narrated, I felt my body and bodily experience. Though, while feeling it, felt the numbness, etching etc. but with the given understanding in narration, i need not to move even slightly and all those 'bodily pains' disappeared. At the start, as usual, yes, could not concentrate but during the flow, had done it. Quite disturbing thoughts had occurred. But, again, narration helps you to overcome those and come back to meditate on " I AM " . As i said, it works like anchor. 

Conclusion, highly recommended. Specially for those people, who have problem of wondering minds and non stop thoughts. If you have done with Maha Aasmani Retreat, surely it will take you back to that experience with understanding. If not, it will give you slight introduction through your self experience. Doesn't matter whether you have attended the retreat or not, this session is for everyone. 

Link for this meditation:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c2YFXQ8WA9I

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] 'I am' meditation - Experiencing beingness | ‘मैं हूँ’ ध्यान (by Sirshree) "

Session 2 :

[ Sirshree_IAm ]

Morning session was so effective, engaging and awesome one, therefore, continued the same again in the evening. Felt quite more relaxed. In the morning, was little distracted and disturbed. This time, was more dedicated.

Although it was evening session, today was easy to concentrate. (As till yesterday, evening sessions are little ineffective compared to mornings. Today, it was reverse effect. Evening session was calmer than morninng one.

Is it because of repeating same session? Or is it because of less work load mentally? Rather, today, i was little bit more engaged mentally in writing another blog ( अभ्यास नकोसा वाटतो : भाग २ ) which was intense in thinking process and was really a little bit exhaustive. Does that make effect? If so, today, it was reverse effect. Need to find this.

Well, about bodily experience, this session was little bit disturbing than morning one. (Comparing this aspect because of having same narration.) Numbness in butts, heels, so needed to relax them. Another distraction was small etching anywhere on the body. The thing learnt today to avoid is, first, to have a 'cool' effect, came with facewash, which was turned into disturbance. The water droplets running on and into the ears - major distraction. Strictly avoid this.


#miPratik


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Day 03 | 23/05/2020

Session 1:

[ Sirshree_Peace ]

Good Morning Peace!

Awesome experience today. Waited for this since so long. Back to my origin from where and with whom I started meditation. Few things today additional to my experience....

What is meditation?

Simply, doing nothing. 

For few people doing nothing is difficult than doing something. But here, this nothing is not an ordinary nothing.

Doing 'nothing' itself is doing a lot than something but only when you are aware about this 'nothing'. And this 'nothing' comes when there is 'no mind'. Mind exist only when thoughts are there. When there is no thought, there is no mind. This state of No Mind is actually what it is being said as Doing Nothing, ultimately the state of meditation.

Thus, during meditation, this doing 'nothing' gives you that peace of mind. Therefore, this 'Peace Meditation'.

The narration tells you about peace meditation. While being seated for meditation, it tells you....

Why you need to do this particular meditation - The Peace Meditation? 

How it will help you to uplift your life? 

The way of how to achieve the peace even after the meditation? 

Rather, how you can have peace of mind not only during but after the meditation too?

Personally, after long many days, had a good experience of meditation, with understanding why to meditate? Wondering of mind had been happened for once at the start of session only, that too about writing this blog :) . Well, once realized, went back to following the narration. Hence, for complete time of 20+ minutes, was in meditation. At the end, even this 20+ minutes felt liked passed a very short period of time. No more mind wondering. Had no attention to any part of the body, therefore, had no bodily 'experience'. Full focused on 'peace' only. 

After long time, was this much deeply involved so that, even after the end of narration, continued being in the session for next few more minutes. After that, somehow opened the eyes, but closed again to continue the session for few more minutes. 

Conclusion, had a wonderful session after a very long time. Holding this 'experience', this narration is recommended for future sessions.

(Numbness in feet and little pain at the center of back experienced after end of session.)

Link for this meditation:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sIkRqf0wsHU&t=3s

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [Hindi] Peace meditation - Inviting peace to bring peace | शांति ध्यान (by Sirshree) "

#miPratik

Session 2:

[ Sirshree_Pyramid ]

Disclaimer: If you have done with Maha Aasmani Retreat, this session is good for you. If not, still you may try but if you are confused with meaning of some words or could not understand the essence, keep that aside from your thoughts and continue.

This session is named as Pyramid meditation because of the contents it has. What is this? Why to do this? How to do this? What are the benefits? All this is narrated at the start of the session.

As since last two days practices, I observe evening session is quite disturbing for me. Could not concentrate that much effectively. Need to work on this. Lot of distraction happens.

At the start, seated straight, shoulder straight, leg crossed, supported the back with pillow. After passing sometime, started pain in heels this time. For some time, ignored and back to meditate. But could not continued well. So, after sometime, left the crossing legs together and kept them straight and relaxed. Small pain at center of back for sometime. Could not continue to be seated straight for longer and slowly bent in back and shoulders down, don't know when - observed after the end of session. Towards the end of session, also, felt etching sensation at different parts of body. Highest disturbance occurred since around mid of the session when started the feeling of numbness in butts. Therefore, lot of movement and so, lot of disturbance. Noting all this happening, bodily experiences were disturbing the required experience to mind.

Conclusion, really felt not that much effective personally. By narration, it is so much important whenever I could concentrate. Recommended next time only after satisfying all physical needs by which bodily experiences would not be the cause of disturbance.

Link for this meditation:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KudMcb5OrKA

If this link does not work, simply follow these steps:

Go to Youtube >> Search " Sirshree Peace Meditation " >> Click on " [HINDI] Pyramid Meditation - Prayer and meditation | पिरामिड ध्यान (by Sirshree) "

#miPratik

****

Day 02 | 22/05/2020

Session 1: 

 [ Rebecca_BodyScan ]

Lot of things to put today, one by one.

The most immediate and impactful thing, the narrator was in hurry to finish the session and got herself distracted (?) for sometime. Good flow at the start. At the peak of session, distraction to suggest about thoughts (accept the thoughts coming in, this is normal and all that.) and all of a sudden back to the session, focus your attention to....So, I felt, what's going on? This was more distracting than anything else.

Second, I felt 13+ minutes was good enough and sufficient time but could not be used at that level. I am not writing this as criticism over narrator but for myself only. Within 13 minutes or so, it could be better if focused on technique than curing flaws. Instead of telling not to distract, narrator should continue to next stage of attention. Person get back to it once realised. Because of this, serious practitioner get distracted. Therefore, I decided, not to play this narration anymore. Well, another view is, it is still good if we have lack of time. But, I am keeping this aside. I would prefer yesterday's second session on repeat mode.

About meditation in actual, mind was quite relaxed. What I felt, in the morning, we do have very much less thoughts. But still they are! Those could be worked upon. But yes, compare to evening session, morning session found to be fruitful. 

Worldly distraction still exist. As I have to start office work soon, thoughts of that rised from nowhere, like planning of work, what to do, how to do, even points for afternoon meeting.....all this continued for merely half a minute. But, oh, distraction is still distraction. Good thing was, this distraction was lesser compared to last evening session. 

Another observation, yes, this happened yesterday too, in morning sessions, mind wonders into futuristic thoughts; whereas, in evening session, mind goes into past memories. Don't know why? Is it because, in the morning, mind is fresh after a relaxed sleep and so planning for the future and in the evening, burdened with all day 'tasks' and so, take an easy way to go into memories than to thinking something new. Does thinking of the future requires more energy than recalling past memories? This question is because, I think, to recall memories is an easy task because all synapses are already created in the brain. On the other hand, to think or to plan about future, new neurons has to be generated and so the new synapses. Need to study this!

Now, about bodily experiences, no back pain today. Actually, I sat quite more comfortable than yesterday. Well, little bit numbness in toe for sometime. Therefore, that was quite distraction till got to normal. And because of hurried narration, felt little bit rushed in mind because of fast and sudden shifting from one part to another. Freshness level, did not observed much effect between before and after session. As said earlier, narrator seems to be in mood of 'finishing' the 'process' and so, could not be that effective as expected. Personally, rejecting this narration for future use.

#miPratik

Session 2

[ Rebecca_Breath ]

For this session, time has been reduced to merely 6+ minutes and the disturbance by narrator is I felt so high. By that sense, not had the feeling of meditation.

Narration was centered on unnecessary instructions like, either be seated or lay down. I know, don't tell me that, ok? Tell me something about meditation. So, at some point later, I left hearing her. I don't know, what she said till the end. Based on previous instructions of yesterday's second session, I continued this one. But intermittent interruptions of narration felt me like disturbing noise without a pause.

Well, in this session, mind was wondering on the topic of meditation itself. Recalling those instructions and somehow, literally somehow, ended this session. Ultimately, can say, just seated and was acting like doing meditation to feel happy about but deep inside, I knew, I am not justifying. So, even wished to continue after ending her 'noise' but could not concentrate. So, left there only.

Nothing about bodily experience as myself was not satisfied with what I am doing and was struggling to have some quality time and quality meditation. Unfortunately, not happend. Therefore, nothing to mention about bodily experiences.

Conclusion for the day, don't go for this particular narration onward.

#miPratik

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Day 01 | 21/05/2020

Session 1: 

 [ Williams_BodyScan ]

This is my first day of meditation.

I did it in the morning, sitting by legs crossed together with self support only.

It went well for first 5 minutes or so. Then I started bending in the back. Few minutes, that was relief. After that, it started feeling pain in right of upper back. Once, the narration came to that point, it stopped paining.

Second thing I felt is lack of breathing. As narration goes, it said, take breath and after some time, leave the breath. I felt, for myself, this time was not sufficient to take breath, hold it and leave it in relaxed mode. So, I started feeling like insufficient breath. Once the meditation overed, I continued to yawning for next few minutes.

Third thing, after this session of almost 40+ minutes, as I went to washroom, that too, I felt water discharging the body calmly, in relaxed way. Later, I had drunk full glass of water, which tasted quite different than usual.

Now I am quite relaxed. Mind is quite silent. Lessen the thoughts. Body is light weighted. Muscles relaxed. :)

#miPratik

Session 2:

[ Williams_Breath&Body ]

To avoid morning 'disturbance' of back pain, this time in evening, I took pillow to rest the back. Initially, I felt it comfortable. But, that 'comfort' is not lasted beyond 3 or 4 minutes. Again it started paining but at different point this time. Left top of back. Need to do something about it. I think, this happens due to lack of practice and in coming days, body will be adjusted. Need some practice of prolonged sitting in same position. That could be the possible solution. So, once this pain went out of bearing capacity, adjusted myself to get comfortable. Alas! Could not hold this too for longer.

Second point, for this session, mind could also not get that much stable as in the morning. Is it because of shear stress to brain and mind after full day of work? No idea. I experienced almost four instances when I was thinking something else and lost the phase of meditation. As narrated, this is fine at this stage. It might happen and it's not wrong at all. Not to blame ourselves. Whenever realized I am out of focus, just get back to it and continue. Did so well.

Lastly, compare to morning's 40+ minutes session, this 8+ minutes session felt too short. Rather, when this session was about to end, I felt, I just started to go into the state of meditation and what? it is ended. Earlier to this, I have practiced to meditate almost for 1+ hours of session. That gives real 'feel'. Well, soon to start that again. 

#miPratik

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